Friday, December 14, 2012

God's Grand Design

The tragedy that hit today in Connecticut hit home with me also. My daughter is 18 months and we had decided to homeschool her probably before her first birthday. Today joust solidified my choice to keep her home. In fact it even made me more solid in homeschooling her full time instead of the university style.

Today's tragedy reminded me that time with my daughter is so fleeting. It reminded me that I am borrowing her from God, she is not my possession. I have been charged with her well being and safety but if He decides to call her home there is not a thing I can do about it.

However, my heart has been in knots since noon when I found out about the school. I cried a little bit all day. I was mad at God and blamed Him for letting this happen. They weren't even my kids but I love all kids as though they were mine as I always have. I just imagine my child being there and my heart literally aches. I discussed with my husband my concerns about the devil being allowed to do this and at the time it didn't feel like he was really listening. Later that night he told me "we are too small to understand the reasoning behind why things happen. We cannot begin to understand the good that will come out of this. We don't know how many people will find Jesus because of this. The tragedy always hurts right away as with any hardship but the long run, even the eternity long run, is what you have to keep in mind."

Does that help a mother who's five year old was taken much too early right before Christmas? Not right away and she will never be the same woman. But I pray that somewhere down the line when the mourning is done, she feels comfort that the best person in the universe is looking over her child. Jesus loves the children and today He wanted some of them back with him.

I will continue to pray for the families of those children. Please do so also.

"You are loved more than you will ever know, by someone who died to know you." -Romans 5:8